Well that was the end of that and this little bundle of cuteness joined the farm on Easter Sunday.
You know what helps feeling sad? Puppies and horses. His official name is Panda. Kung Moo Panda to be exact.
Life hasn't been all about dogs and puppies. This year has had its ups and downs and I am still trying to find my way. The good news is I have realized my divorce was a blessing and the best thing to happen to me. If I can offer anyone any advice it would be do what makes you happy. Don't force yourself to deal with a mistake or endure living with a negative [not the best word to describe him as he is far worse] person because you feel trapped. Sometimes you get so used to that dysfunction that it seems normal. I finally feel happy again and am working on getting back to my old self. The self before I met him, before I allowed him to change me.
During this journey I didn't feel like riding. I rode occasionally but nothing like before. I worked ALOT. A lot! And spent time with friends. Unfortunately some people don't want you to be happy and have to sabotage that. He continues to try to take that from me and although he can steal from me and take all the material things he will not break me. Everything he does makes me that much more grateful to be divorced from him. This journey included removing all ties to him. I cannot have someone in my life who has violated me, my home, lied, and stolen from me. I learned that those who could not understand this were not my true friends. No matter how long I had known them. Unfortunately the owner of the barn I trained with since 1999 did not want to sever ties with him so I chose to change trainers. This was incredibly hurtful. Incredibly.
Change can be good. In order to move on some doors need to be closed and change is needed to grow. I have known my new trainer for quite awhile and she was an easy choice. I felt we share the same training philosophies and she has also been a fan of Poppy since I got her. The farm is nearby and has a fantastic ring to lesson in.
I was sad to miss showing at HITS this year. The reality was divorce is freaking expensive (and the nightmare refinance of the farm) and I was not getting enough riding time in to get Poppy fit again. My horse comes first and it was not in her best interest to show as out of shape as she was.
Daylight Savings and drier weather has enabled me to ride more. I am entered in a 2 week series in April. I am really looking forward to getting back in the show ring. Thank you for sticking by me through my hiatus and I hope you will join me on this road back to the ring...